Stay or leave: a question that keeps coming back unresolved
This page is for people in a relationship for whom a question remains unresolved, without clarity ever settling in.
The situation, named precisely
You have been in a relationship for a while, and a question keeps coming back without ever resolving itself: stay or leave.
The same discussions come up, often in the same terms, without the situation really moving in either direction.
What is actually going on
Prolonged indecision in a relationship often reflects several distinct dynamics, hard to untangle from the inside.
It can involve a gap between what each person perceives about the relationship and what a more objective measure shows (perception gap), attachment patterns that make closeness or distance uncomfortable (attachment security), unresolved disagreements on fundamentals like family or the relationship structure envisioned (values clarity), or conflict patterns that prevent repair after tension (conflict management).
What an instrument like the RDP can and cannot do here
In a situation of prolonged indecision, the RDP is not meant to settle the question of staying or leaving.
It can map the 9 dimensions of the relational profile, make the gap between self-perception and the psychometric measure explicit, and offer a roadmap of priorities.
It cannot decide for you, make a diagnosis, or predict the future of a relationship. Its doctrine is explicit: "do what YOU judge healthiest for you, those around you, and your future."
When to consult a professional rather than a questionnaire
In the face of acute distress, a situation of violence, or dark thoughts, a human professional always comes before a questionnaire — however precise it may be. In that case, the right move is to contact that help right away.
In France: 3114 for suicide prevention, 3919 — Violences Femmes Info (women experiencing violence and witnesses). Outside France, local emergency services should be contacted.
Help numbers appear in every report. A “Need help right now?” link, always visible, shows the help lines first and hides every offer for the rest of the visit: it is your choice: it stays on your device for the length of the visit and is not sent to anyone. When in doubt, the instrument steps aside for the human.